T is for Teeth Whitening

For my Pinterest project theme for the A to Z Challenge, I have cooked. I have made jewelry. I have cleaned my burners. I have killed insects. Today, I whiten my teeth.

Maybe.

Here's the pin:

Found on livelaughandlovewithlana.blogspot.com

Activated charcoal, which is made from real, honest-to-God charcoal, like the kind you use in a grill, I kid you not, is used to treat poisonings and drug overdoses in hospitals. It can also be used to treat, um, flatulence issues, to lower cholesterol and as a hangover remedy.

And it is said to whiten teeth.

Challenge accepted.

Walmart no longer carries activated charcoal (hmmm, wonder why?), but after a Facebook plea by me, my friend Tracy offered to bring some to me. It comes in capsule form, and the first order of business is to empty the charcoal out of the capsule. The directions did say that the charcoal stains and gets EVERYWHERE (it does) and to take care when using it. Since I was in the upstairs bathroom and really far from the kitchen (and it's been confirmed that I'm lazy), I used a plastic spoon as a receptacle for the charcoal (don't make me explain why I have plastic spoons in my bathroom). 

Ruby was oddly attracted to the charcoal capsules.

I couldn't pull the halves of the capsule apart, so I had to cut it open.
It may have been for the best, since yanking it apart probably would have
sent charcoal powder flying all over the bathroom.

The next step was to dip a wet toothbrush into the charcoal and brush for two minutes. Oh, and to remember that it stains, so be careful.

The rest of the story is best told in pictures:

All done and brushed with the minty freshness of Colgate.

Here is my before and after picture:

I need braces.

Can you tell a difference? Pretty sure it's minimal, if any.

I felt like I needed more evidence than just my experience, so, after bribing him with the promise of baking him a lemon cake (sucker), I convinced my husband to try it:

He has a very small mouth (which he passed to our daughter
and has cost us thousands of dollars in orthodontic treatment).
He is also now complaining that his mouth feels like an
aquarium, but he's exaggerating, because the charcoal was,
believe it or not, tasteless. Dry, but tasteless.

Still not seeing a real difference, although the Pinterest pin SWORE everyone who tried it saw immediate results.

One more guinea pig (whom I bribed with the promise of cooking supper and actually did):

MANY THOUSANDS of dollars to fix those teeth....

Okay, maaaaybe I see a real difference, but I think I'm still going to have to say this one was a Pinterest FAIL (and you can thank me in advance for sparing you any pictures of the inside of the sink, with black spit splattered everywhere).

But don't take MY word for it. PLEASE try this challenge yourself. And post pictures.

S is for Shaving Cream Painting

Preschoolers love anything involving paint. 

I found a paint project for my Pre-K class to do that used paint but wasn't messy (for them). 

Shaving cream painting. And it's really cool!

Here's the Pinterest pin:

Found on ashley-ulicni.blogspot.com

Cool, huh? And it was (mostly) easy!

We gave each child a paper plate, a small mound of shaving cream, and a plastic knife. The child's job was to spread the shaving cream evenly on the plate (we helped them after they goobered it around the plate a bit first). 

Next, we squeezed some acrylic paint in horizontal stripes across the shaving cream and gave the child a toothpick, showing them how to drag the toothpick through the shaving cream and make patterns with the paint.

When the child was satisfied with the way the paint was mixed, we laid an egg cut from white cardstock onto the shaving cream and pressed very gently, then peeled the egg off.

Pressing egg onto shaving cream.

Gently lifting the egg from the shaving cream.

Before the shaving cream is scraped off.

Using a spatula (a squeegee would probably work really great, but all we had was a spatula, so, yeah), scrape the shaving cream off the egg and discard.

And after!

You are left with an AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL, MARBLED-EFFECT EASTER EGG!

Make sure you tilt your iphone as you balance on the top step of a flight of stairs to take this picture,
making it look as though the bulletin board is hung crookedly on the wall, which it certainly is not.

PINTEREST WIN!

R is for Rainbow Cake

I almost backed out of today's planned (yes, I really do plan these things) Pinterest project for the A to Z Challenge. I woke up at 5:00 a.m. yesterday morning in a panic over how complicated the whole thing was probably going to be and searched through Pinterest for another project, but nothing jumped out at me, and besides, this was something I really did want to try.

Here's the pin:

Found on marthastewart.com

Knowing it was a Martha Stewart recipe, I anticipated this to be complicated. I was right.

After a trip to Hobby Lobby for gel food coloring from the cake decorating department in all the colors of the *ahem* rainbow, I went home and got to work. (The total I've invested in this year's A to Z Challenge is now up to roughly $23,297, I believe). 

Several of the ingredients in the cake recipe needed to be at room temperature, which they weren't, so I set them (egg whites, milk, and butter) on top of the stove to hurry them along with the help of the vent from the oven that I was pre-heating. Half an hour later, I was able to start the cake. (The cake recipe wasn't difficult, but I thought the consistency of the batter was awfully thin. I realize a scratch cake and a cake mix cake are very different animals, but it still seemed a little runny to me 

See? Runny. Didn't seem right.

The next step is when the whole thing turned into a pain in the ass.

The batter had to be divided equally into six different bowls. In case you wondered, there really is no good way to do this, and certainly no NEAT way. I finally decided on using the ice cream scoop to divvy up the batter and keep each bowl as equal as possible, and I must say, it was ingenious, because three scoops per bowl was EXACTLY right.

Next, I squeezed in the gel food coloring, one color per bowl, and stirred them into the batter. Piece of cake (tee hee!).

Pain in the ass part again: each layer had to be baked in a 9" round cake pan that was greased (I used cooking spray), lined with a piece of parchment paper, cut to fit the bottom of the pan, and the parchment greased (or sprayed with more cooking spray). Dear Martha said to do this to all six pans.

WHO IN THE HELL HAS SIX 9" CAKE PANS LYING AROUND THEIR KITCHEN?!

I had exactly two pans, so I had to bake two layers at a time, then wait for the finished layers to cool for ten minutes before turning them out onto a rack, washing and drying the pans, and tracing and cutting out two new parchment paper circles to go in the bottom for the next two layers.

Three hours later, the layers were baked and cooled. Instead of Martha's frosting recipe, I went with a recipe of my own that I like rather well (1 cup butter or margerine, softened, one jar of marshmallow cream, two cups of powdered sugar, and a pinch of salt) and put the cake together. I thought the layers had a bit of a rubbery feel to them, but they LOOKED pretty.

Dig my early 1980's era Tupperware cake holder?

L

Does that look as tall as Martha's cake? I'm onto her.
Smoke and mirrors.

Looks pretty much like Martha's.

Yeah, I did this. 

The cake had a coarse crumb, but it tasted good. I think if I were to make it again (and I might, but not for a long, long time), I would forget Martha's recipe and use a white cake mix. 

Yes, it was a huge pain in the ass, but I'd still call it a Pinterest win.

***Special Note*** If I were to serve this cake to my preschoolers (or any other vibrantly colored food, like electric blue-frosted cupcakes), I would give them the same talk I'm about to give to you. After eating this, your poo most likely will turn green. You can test it if you don't believe me.

***Another Note*** I am aware of the hypocrisy of telling you this after writing in "M is for Magic Oil" that I am too ladylike to talk about such things, but if I make it a general statement that is not directly about me, then I can justify it.

***Yet Another Note*** My preschoolers always come to school the next time and tell me how I was RIGHT and THEIR POOP WAS GREEN! It is not necessary that you report your findings to me, but if you do, you won't be the first one to do so.

Q is for Quinoa Fried Rice

The first time I tried quinoa, I hated it. HATED it. 

A couple of years ago, I participated in a Pinterest Challenge by Anna Hartman from In The Next 30 Days. She challenged bloggers to make a recipe or project from one of our "eleventy-billion" Pinterest pins that we've pinned but not made. I gave a recipe for Crispy Quinoa Bake a try and it was not good. Not good at all. I hated the texture. I hated the recipe itself (bland and uninteresting). 

In spite of my (some say) picky eating habits, I decided to give quinoa another try last year and actually found a couple of recipes that we not only like, we LOVE: black bean and quinoa enchilada bake and little quinoa patties that taste like little crab cakes. 

For the A to Z Challenge, I decided to search through Pinterest and try to find a quinoa recipe to add to our little bitty repertoire of quinoa recipes (all two of them). 

I ran across this one:

Found on cookingforkeeps.com

We like fried rice, so it seemed like a sure winner.

It wasn't.

Know what happens if you stir-fry quinoa like you would rice?

You get a big, gummy glob of quinoa that tastes like fried rice.

Because quinoa is much more fragile than rice is. 

I'd show you, but I forgot to take any pictures.

If you were watching your carbs and had a craving for gummy fried rice, then I guess I'd tell you to go ahead and give it a try, but otherwise, just make rice. 

Trust me.

Ten Quick Thankfuls

I'm behind on my A to Z Challenge reading. I know I will GET behind in my 10 Things of Thankful reading (technically, I already am, because I know plenty of TToT posts have already been, well, posted, but if I haven't SEEN the list of posts, then does it really exist?). If I can get MY TToT posted, then I can have a whole day to read, read, READ. So here goes:

1. It's spring. It rains. But it DIDN'T rain the two afternoons I was working my side job with the photographer, taking pictures of little basketball players one day and middle school track teams the other day.

2. In spite of all the rain, my ant count remains low. Sunday-Tuesday, I had no ants. Wednesday-Friday I saw one ant each day (don't try to tell me if I saw one there had to be more; that's my story and I'm sticking to it). 

This has nothing to do with my TToT, but I don't really have any
pictures to use to illustrate my post this week. This is a project
I did with my primary kids. It's the Very Hungry Caterpillar.
It was very messy, but it turned out pretty cute.

3. Thankful for peppermint essential oil. See #2.

4. I misplaced a credit card, and after about 24 hours of panic, I found it in the pocket of a pair of pants that were hanging in my closet. Crisis averted.

5. I'm thankful for super comfy mattresses in hotels. I'm lying on one now that I would like to tie on top of my car and take home with me.

6. Volleyball tournaments that are far enough out of town that you can justify staying in a hotel. Because it's fun to stay in a hotel!

7. I'm continuing to enjoy doing the A to Z Challenge. This week, I've learned how to make an awesome pendant, cleaned my stove burners (while at the same time burning the lining from my airways with ammonia fumes) and found a special, special use for eucalyptus essential oil. 

8. I'm also thankful for thing I learned NOT to do again, thanks to my A to Z Challenge. I won't be making oatmeal in the crockpot overnight again, or at least, not for myself. My husband actually LIKED the stuff!

9. I'm thankful that my daughter's club volleyball team is made up of such a great group of girls and their parents! We're all going out to dinner tonight (sorry for that in advance, Chili's). Girls, parents, coaches. And it will be lovely!

Jump, #4!

10. I'm planning to eat ice cream tonight. I haven't told anyone else this, but it's true. After we have dinner with the team, I'm stopping somewhere for ice cream on our way back to the hotel. I really love ice cream.

That's it. That's my list for this week. Now I'm off to dinner. And then ice cream. And then a comfy hotel bed. Link up, link up, link up!

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P is for Pendant

I am not the craftiest person you'll ever meet. Except for preschool crafts, that is. I rock the preschool crafts. When I started mapping out my A to Z topics, however, I knew I couldn't do just preschool crafts and recipes, the two main subjects I research and pin on Pinterest, so I started looking for crafts I might actually do. And like.

I found this pin and thought it didn't look unreasonably difficult, plus the end result was a really cute necklace. I penciled it in for "G is for glass pendant" and hit the craft store.

Found on sabbyinsuburbia.blogspot.com

Three craft stores later, I discovered you cannot buy glass craft tiles where I live. Nor can you buy the special adhesive called Paper Glaze or Diamond Glaze. As my mother would say, my cake was dough.

While I wasn't going to be able to make this (or attempt to make this) for "G," I was still determined to make it (or attempt to make it) anyway, because I thought it was cute, and I renamed it "P is for Pendant," which really isn't cheating, is it? There was a link for Sun And Moon Craft Kits in the project directions, and I ordered glass tiles and glaze from them. The package arrived on, naturally, the day AFTER "G" day, and, as I was busy squishing ants with peppermint essential oil on a cotton ball, I didn't even open the box until this week.

I had picked up a couple of sheets of scrapbooking paper that I liked before I found out that I couldn't buy glass tiles locally, so I actually had all the materials on the list (woot! woot!). Wednesday evening, I went to work on the project.

Picking out the pattern.

A coating of the glaze goes on the tile, then the paper is stuck to it, face down.

After about 30 minutes, glaze is applied to the back of the paper side of the pendant.

When the glaze is dry (directions said 5 or 6 hours; actuality was more like
15 hours before it was completely dry) glue on the bales. I didn't know
what bales were until I read the supply list for the project. A bale is the little thingy at the
top of the pendant for the chain or ribbon to go through so you can wear it.

When you realize your bale was different than the ones in the project directions, and
you go to the three craft stores AGAIN and find out the only ones available are the
ones you already bought (and already glued down) and now it won't hang correctly,
you use your noodle and buy some little rings to go through the bale and save the day.

Pendant #1 on a brown satin ribbon. Yes, I used my new light box.

Pendant #2 on a length of hemp cord that I'm not sure I like.
The cord, that is. LOVE the pendant.

Making the pendants wasn't as easy as it looked. Cutting the paper to fit the back of the pendant was trickier than you might imagine; it had to be slightly smaller than than the tile, corners rounded, BUT NOT TOO MUCH. Fortunately, paper is cheap. Also, getting the glaze on without it slopping over the sides was another breath-holding exercise. And I had to wear my strongest pair of old lady readers to see what I was doing. The difficulty factor also went up considerably every time Ruby tried to help me. But I'm calling the end result a Pinterest WIN.

Anybody want me to make them a necklace?!

O is for Overnight Oatmeal

I like oatmeal. Not that nasty instant stuff; the real kind, made on the stove (you know, my stove with the sparkling clean burners). With raisins. And cinnamon. And a little brown sugar. Basically, a warm oatmeal cookie in bowl that you eat with a spoon.

I can make a nice bowl of oatmeal in about ten minutes, start to finish, and that includes walking down the stairs to the kitchen. So why am I going to make oatmeal that takes 8-9 hours to cook? Because I saw it on Pinterest, that's why!

Found on bestfoodpins.com
The instructions were right on the pin. I did peel the apples before throwing them in, because I envisioned the peel sloughing off into the oatmeal and that was gross.

Apples, brown sugar and cinnamon

Oatmeal and water added.

The crockpot is on low. And now we wait....

...Good morning! Time for breakfast!

Taking the lid off the crockpot. Hmmm.

Gave it a good stir to get all the ingredients emulsified.
It's...gluey.

This does not look like the Pinterest pin.
It also does not taste like I would expect from the Pinterest pin.
A little blah. A lot gluey.

Added a little more brown sugar. And raisins.
And a splash of milk to loosen it up a bit.

I was never one of those kids who ate the paste in kindergarten,
but now I believe I have a pretty good idea what it would have been like.
This is my just-rolled-out-of-bed, no-make-up look, punctuated by
the gluey, gloppy oatmeal face. Lovely, huh?

By the time I added the additional brown sugar (which was a mistake, as I found a pocket of brown sugar in my bowl that didn't get mixed up with the rest of the paste oatmeal in the bowl), raisins and milk, it took me about ten minutes.

Which is how long it takes me to make it in a pan on the stove and still have individual oats in the oatmeal.

Pinterest faaaaail!