It's been a breathtakingly beautiful fall weekend, bright blue skies, light breeze, orange and yellow and red mixed in with the green (and drought brown) leaves, and the angle of the sun is only seen this time of year. I'm wearing a flannel shirt, the Chiefs are playing, and all's right in the world.
Sort of.
While fall is my very favorite time of year, sometimes it makes me feel wistful. Blue. Sad, even. It was my mom's favorite time of year, too, and it makes me miss her more than ever, knowing how much she would have enjoyed a weekend like this.
I was shopping early this afternoon for a simple black blouse when a display of coats caught my eye. I've had the same lightweight, waterproof jacket for, oh, over 15 years. It does its job and shows no wear, but it's purple, and I feel like either Barney or a very large eggplant when I wear it, so I tried on a beautiful, deep red trench coat. It seemed to fit well and the color was gorgeous. Then I realized I haven't bought a coat by myself maybe ever. My mom always took me shopping to buy a coat whenever I needed one (and sometimes when I didn't but SHE thought I should have a long one or a short one or a warmer one or a lighter weight one or....).
My eyes began to sting and there was a lump in my throat as I had only a mirror to tell me whether it looked good or not, and let me tell you, that person in the mirror is a harsh critic. I carried it around the store, not wanting to spend so much money on a coat just because I didn't want to hear the Barney theme song in my head every time I put on my old one. I texted my husband, who said "Get it if you like it!" I just wanted my mom there to tell me I looked pretty.
I finally talked myself into the coat. I took it to the register. The $150 coat was on sale for $105. I had a coupon for 40% off. It brought the price down to $60. My mom would have been pleased we got such a deal (although she would have paid the full retail price for it if I liked it, in spite of me protesting). And I felt a little better inside.
Now for my Ten Things of Thankful:
I found the black blouse I needed and it was also on sale plus an extra 40% off.
I'm finally going to give the Barney coat away to someone who could really use it.
Freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.
Cookie dough, which I like better than the cookies anyway.
Aldi take and bake pizzas.
Listening to the Homestead Pickers at Silver Dollar City.
Running into an old friend at Aldi (Hi again, Sandy!).
That Sandy saw me and waved, because I'm always in my own little world when I'm out and don't particularly notice anyone else.
Candy pumpkins.
Harrison Butker.
The coat looks beautiful on you, i just know it. (And as for the purple, it's my favorite color in the whole world, i'll be hoping to find a purple one soon as even the swamps are cooling a bit. To each her own!)
ReplyDeleteAlso, i teared up a bit at your story, please accept my condolences for the loss of your mother. No matter how long it's been, i know it isn't easy.
I should sent the purple coat to you! The thing doesn't seem to wear! Thank you for your sweet words about my mama. It's been 6 long years.
DeleteGrief has a mind all its own. I'm glad you were able to find a coat that brings you joy, even amidst the grief.
ReplyDeleteYou introduced me to the Homestead Pickers! I need to pull out the CD I purchased and give them a listen again. Hearing them at Silver Dollar City was a great experience!
I really love the color of the coat. It makes me happy and I feel nothing like Barney now. I forgot you got a cd of the Pickers! I adore them and could sit and listen to them all day if the benches weren't wooden!
DeleteHow there is a part of each of (both little and large) that keeps the parts of life alive (and therefore a part of us) despite time and the passing of people.
ReplyDeleteWhile certainly not preferable, your time in front of the mirror demonstrates how much people become a part of other people.
funny about the light in autumn... no other time of year has such undeniable conditions as that high-contrast light in the Fall
We take a little part of everyone we meet with us, either as a gift or a lesson.
DeleteThere is nothing like the slant of the sun against trees that you find in the fall!