Thursday, August 6, 2015

Reservation: A Six Sentence Story


She approached the desk with confidence and, seeing no one there, rang the bell and waited somewhat impatiently, fidgeting with her jacket and picking imaginary lint from her skirt, until a heavy wooden door behind the desk opened, and a white haired gentleman stepped through it. 

With a nod to her, he asked for her name as he lifted a large, leather-bound ledger from beneath the desk and flipped it open, thumbing through the pages as she announced in a clear voice, "Meredith Kelly."

The gentleman pulled a pair of spectacles from his pocket and put them on the end of his nose as he ruffled through the pages, bending closer as his eyes followed his finger down a page, then stopped suddenly and closed the book with a soft whoomp.

"We have no reservation for Meredith Kelly," he said coldly as her polite smile faded and her eyes grew confused.

"There must be some kind of mistake," she began, but he interrupted her, firmly stating, "We don't make mistakes here, Miss Kelly."

"But--" she began, but before she could finish her protest, the gentleman reached beneath the desk, and as he did so, the floor opened beneath her, dropping her down into the fiery abyss.

Linking up with Ivy at Uncharted for Six Sentence Stories with the prompt "reservation."

28 comments:

  1. I was just waiting for someone to die. What happened to the happy go lucky Dyanne?!? What are these 6 sentences doing to you?!? :)

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  2. I truly enjoy your six sentence stories each week, I always know they are going to surprise me!

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  3. Holy, hell. Great story.

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  4. I'm with everyone today, good Story… the ever elusive, totally genuine surprise ending! v cool

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  5. Now what did she do wrong? I had a good laugh at this one as she arrived with such confidence!

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    1. I wondered myself what she did, because she was very sure she had that reservation!

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  6. I really enjoyed this piece. Sentence 3 - so vivid in my mind's eye. Well done Dyanne! Most excellent ending!!

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    1. Thanks, Denise! I pictured him slightly stooped, with fingers bent slightly by arthritis.

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    2. Isn't that the coolest thing about writing? You already had a perfect picture of what he looked like in your mind. The inference of what he might look like. I for sure did not have him with arthritic fingers. Nice:)

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  7. I didn't see that last sentence coming. Great writing.

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  8. Ohh! the ending came as if someone stood behind me to say 'boo!' I felt a jerk.
    Impressive!

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  9. I thought exactly the same thing as Ivy: WHO ARE YOU? Will you use "Meredith Kelly" as your pen name? That would be no mistake! You really have a knack for telling scary stories!

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    1. Thanks, Kristi! I promise that I will use "Meredith Kelly" as a pen name, just for you :)

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