There are no backsies in life, so if life gives you lemons (or breast cancer) laugh in its face and move forward.
Monday, September 17, 2012
Three Random Stories
Three Random Stories (For No Other Reason Than I Am Bored And Can't Think Of Anything Else To Write About):
A friend's husband, whom I shall call "Ray" to protect the innocent, grew bored while waiting for a plane and began sending my friend silly texts. Being a man, it eventually turned into him making little pictures of his wife's boobs ( • ) ( • ) which he decided didn't accurately reflect her, ahem, size, so he changed them to ( • )( • ). (He really could have done ( • )( • ) and not misrepresented them at all. Seriously.) Just for fun, he did old lady boobs \./ \./ Then, because my friend had told him about my tram flap and reconstruction, he made MY boobs (○)(○). Pretty decent rendition. Then he made my boobs with tattoos (@)(@) I do love being a source of entertainment! Of course, since the tattoo thing didn't happen, he could have stopped at (○)(○) Although if you include the incision scars, they would look more like (-○-)(-○-), but that skews the size dramatically.
Then there was a news story this week about a teacher who had nursed her baby in front of her class. (Oh, the shock and horror of it all....) I was pointing out that it IS possible to nurse and be completely discreet at the same time, because I was always VERY CAREFUL about that when I nursed my kiddos, when my husband interrupted me by saying, "You're not that way now. Your boobs have seen more people than a Judds reunion concert."
And that leads me to my third story. I was visiting with my friend Jonette after a swim meet this past weekend, filling her in on the aborted tattoo appointment, when a friend of Jonette's joined the conversation. She was intrigued by my tram flap and reconstruction, so the three of us trooped into the bathroom and had a little show and tell session in the shower area at the Y. So, yes, I showed my boobies to a complete stranger in a public restroom.
Maybe I should start selling tickets. It worked for the Judds....
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